I’ve been doing some apartment hunting and finding something decent that isn’t horribly expensive seems very difficult. I’m sick of living in dark, dirty old apartments next to drug dealers. Is that really too much to ask to be able to walk down the street without some guy trying to get me in his car or sell me pills? But hopefully I will be able to move soon, I just have to be really good and not spend money on anything for awhile.

My teeth also really hurt right now. Yes I did just say my teeth hurt. I’ve been lazy about going to the dentist and today was the first time in maybe two years that I have been there. I just hate getting my teeth scraped with that metal hook, it freaks me out! But my negligence cost me. I had nine cavities that the dentist decided to drill without using any Novocaine. Looks like it’s soup for dinner tonight!

But now for the good stuff! Well this story made me happy at least. I was in Victoria’s Secret shopping for a bar/panty set for a valentines shoot I have coming up. I found a cute bra but it wasn’t in my size so I asked the sales girl if they had a 34B. She look at me a bit awkwardly and asked me the last time I was measured. Ummm…never? So right there in the middle of the store she pulls out her little tape measure and starts measuring my tits. Turns out I’ve been wearing the wrong bra size all this time. I’m actually a 32C/D! When she told me that it felt like my boobs just magically grew, I was so happy.

And now some good news for my fans I just had a new video come out at the Dangerous Dolls. This is by far my favorite masturbation video I have shot. It features me doing kinky things with close pins and tape while wearing my favorite underbust corset. It’s playfully titled “Chop Suey” because I get off while listening to System of a Down.

So far everyone on the site seems to love it. six0seven commented:
“damn… damn…. damn…. uh.. damn… I’m gonna be watching this over and over and over and over and….. ”

So if you want to get in on the fun click the banner below and join the dangerous dolls for free!

-How did you get interested in performance art?
When I was a little girl, I loved the Fly Girls from In Living Color, and wanted to grow up to be one…I’d mimic their dance moves…they were always so crazy and funky…then when I got older, I discovered GWAR, and really admired Danielle Stampe’s roll in the band as Slymenstra Hymen(very empowering to women, funny, creative, and talented). By the time I was 16, I knew that I wanted to be a performance artist for bands, but didn’t have the confidence, so I forced myself to learn how to be more femanine and gain a stage presence by becoming an exotic dancer at 18. Within’ a year or so, I was offered a Halloween show by a local band, and got a great response, proved to myself I had what it takes, and haven’t looked back much since. In all honesty, I think I was born to be on stage, it’s always been what makes me the happiest, and where I’m at my most comfortable.

-What is the weirdest thing you have done for a performance?
I didn’t do this, but it happened to me…I have this boar’s head I made that I used to wear for shows, and it’s really hard to see out of. At one point last year, while performing with The Pleasure Elite, this girl jumped on stage, and I could barely see her. I ran towards her, and she tackled me, throwing me into the guitar stack, breaking my boars head(r.i.p.), then she threw my legs back and bit my labia majora…hard. I threw my palm up into her crotch and dug into it really hard, and was gonna fuck her up on stage, but she jumped back into the audience. My pussy was bruised for almost a week. I was pist, and then to top things off, she started contacting me on myspace trying to hook up. I wanted nothing to do with the psycho. Who the fuck bites into a stranger’s vagina like they’re going after a steak? Seriously…

-Besides being a performance artist you are also a musician, who are some of your musical influences?
GWAR, I love how rude and funny they are…plus it’s like a live action comic book to see their live shows. Alice Cooper, Howlin’ Wolf, Tom Waits, Ministry, Portishead, honestly, I love music so much, I listen to everything. Anyone with a distinct voice or a killer stage presence always catches my attention. The music I write covers so many different genres, and when I sing in my truck, it’s more bluesy stuff. My current band, Bastard Child, combines so many genres of music and is a funny/performance art project, but I would really like to do a serious blues project one day.

-You have some really beautiful ink, is there any one tattoo that has a special meaning to you or that you like the more than the rest?
Thank you. They all mean a lot to me. All my tats are well thought out and planned. In my head, I’m pretty much already covered, just waiting for my pocketbook to reflect that….ha ha ha. I think the one that means the most would be the two lines on my ring finger. They are the simplest, but definately mean the world to me.

-You mentioned that modeling isn’t you main passion, do you still enjoy the artistic aspect of it or do you do it more as a way to promote your other work?
Honestly, I only do it because people like to take my picture and they seem to think I’m good at it. Modeling only goes with the territory. It definitely helps with promoting the band and what not, but I don’t really see myself as a model. That’s why I love being on Deviant Nation so much, because the main focus isn’t really modeling so much as it is the community. Don’t get me wrong, I like having my picture taken…I’m very vain, but at the same time I don’t really seek out photographers. I dunno, the stage is where I fully express myself, and you can rarely capture that energy in a photograph.

-Not to sound too much like a job interview but seeing as you have a variety of talents/interests I can’t help but ask, what do you see yourself doing five years from now?
Being on stage. It’s all I’ve ever wanted since I was in grade school. I used to dream of being on a stage, hearing the roar of the audience. Music is what I live for. When I perform, it’s my interpretation of the music flowing through me, and writing music is just another way for my body to express what my words fail at. Anytime I’ve taken time off from performing, I’ve become a miserable and anti-social person. It’s my outlet, and I honestly can’t see doing anything else.

-And lastly just for fun, if you could have any superhuman powers what would they be and why?
The ability to grow up to a 15″ long penis at any given time…it’d have to dissapear at will too…then I could create some neat party gags, fuck like a man when I wanted to, and still have my beautiful Miss Kitty that I’m incredibly attached too. lol

See and hear more of Zebrana Bastard’s work at the following links:
Deviant Nation
The Pleasure Elite
Bastard Child